You get a new phone. It is your pride and joy. Everywhere you go, it goes. But then one day your phone has a nasty accident, gets kidnapped or gets infiltrated by an enemy covert operations unit and subjected to a virulent brainwashing attack and it is never the same again. All these scenarios happen. They happen very regularly, in fact. The good news is that there is a lot you can do about it. Below is a range of armour to protect your, well let’s face it, your nearest and dearest.

Invisi-shield protectors

(photo courtesy of blueunplugged.com)

If I had a pound for every time one of my friends, or indeed my good self, cracked the screen on a mobile phone I would be a millionaire. Mobile phone screens are fragile little things and they just don’t do well when get dropped, smashed angrily against a wall in frustration, have hot tea liberally applied all over the surface or get stepped on by your big oaf of a brother. The problem is that a cracked screen, when not a status symbol of the uncaring too-cool-for-school types, is very annoying and of course not cheap or that easy to replace. Invisi-shield protectors are cheap mobile-screen saving devices.

Silicone Covers

(photo courtesy of mobilemadhouse.co.uk)

More of a fashion statement than a real protector. These come in a range of different patterns and designs. They particularly appeal to teenage girls looking for a bit of bling on the back of their phone. For some reason my girlfriend also loves them and has one with very fetching plastic diamond studs arranged in the shape of a cat. She loves having the cat stare up at her when we go out to eat. I have developed a slight fear of the feline monstrosity. But then, I am easily scared…

Camden Town, London, and in fact almost any place with market stalls, will sell them in an abundance of styles. Unfortunately, where they succeed in looking – cough, cough, hack, cough and cough again  – cool, they lack anything like even basic protection. In fact, I only included them in this article so I could provide you with a very clear, stark piece of advice to invest your fiver (please tell me you didn’t pay anymore) on anything but them. In addition to providing nothing in the way of protection for your screen, which in case you had forgotten is the most vulnerable part of your phone, they give a false sense of security and also make your new sleek iPhoneor Galaxy Nexuslook clunky. They are also a nightmare to get out your pocket as the material tends to stick to your pocket with an unrelenting vice-like grip not seen since The Blob, which is very tedious indeed.

Hanging pouches

(photo courtesy of miniinthebox.com)

Another one for the fashion unconscious. Actually, I must confess to liking these a little, so much so that I even bought one for my mum once. She loved it. I reckon a bit more love goes into the design, but having one of these hanging around your neck might not be the epitome of cool. The general feeling is that in a professional environment it is acceptable – you always see them in conferences – but that you better keep them hidden behind a top of some kind if you don’t want to draw stares in the street. Such blatant advertising of your wares also may accidentally target an undesirable grouping, namely thieves. Perhaps keep this one under wraps on a boozy Friday night on the town.

Pouches do keep your phone very safe from accidental knocks. And unless you run very fast straight into a wall or any other large stationary, impassable object, your phone will be well protected. That is until you decide to take it out while running down the street and leave it at the mercy of your butterfingers.

David Thompson is a fresh and upcoming technology and entertainment blogger who enjoys the challenges of creativity and attention to detail. His specific areas of interest include film, gaming and the mobile industry, encompassing everything from manufacturer-specific news from Apple to industry announcements from the likes of O2